Vivian Silver
Vivian was born in the middle of nowhere, or so she referred to Winnipeg, Canada. Minus 40 degrees in the winter, plus 40 degrees in summer. Her grandparents came from Eastern Europe; her parents Meir and Rosalyn were both born in Canada. Their children, Vivian, Neil and Rachel, were all born in Canada. The family was a typical Jewish one, with the usual pressures, but Vivian herself was an unusual child. She was apparently a good girl and an outstanding student in school, and she also played piano. She enjoyed being in the limelight – Vivian belonged to a drama club. Her mother signed her up for a screen test and after she passed it, Vivian became a child actress for 8 years. During this time, she appeared on the stage in musicals and also appeared in TV dramas and commercials. As an adolescent, she belonged to the B’nai B’rith movement, and in twelfth grade she became president of the B’nai B’rith in her city. By this time, her pleasant but uncompromising personality was clear to all.
Vivian began studying literature and psychology at university, and received a grant to spend a year studying at the Hebrew University of Jerusalem. It was only when she returned to Canada that she realized her affinity to Judaism had moved from religion to Zionism. She remained active in Jewish Zionist movements until the end of her studies and fought anti-Israel propaganda. Through this, she met other young people from the New York branch of the Habonim movement, who were forming a group to make Aliyah to a kibbutz in Israel. In 1972, Vivian moved to New York and joined the commune. This was an extremely meaningful time for her: Vivian was very active in Habonim, in founding the feminist Jewish movement and also preparing the group for their move to Kibbutz Gezer.
Vivian married Marty, a member of the group, in New York. Together they made Aliyah to Israel in 1974. Marty returned, Vivian remained a member of the kibbutz for 16 years. Naturally, she was an active and involved member, the first woman in a number of roles traditionally given to men, such as kibbutz secretary and construction coordinator. It is no surprise that in 1981, she founded the department for the advancement of gender equality in the kibbutz movement. This was no easy struggle. Vivian edited a pamphlet of articles on the subject and then distributed it throughout the kibbutz movement in order to heighten awareness about this painful and hitherto unspoken topic.
During this period of time, Vivian met Lewis Zeigen, a member of Kibbutz Gesher HaZiv. Lewis joined Vivian at Kibbutz Gezer and they had two children, Chen and Yonatan. In 1990, the family moved to Kibbutz Be'eri. Vivian and Lewis once again had to find their own place there. Lewis worked in the dairy and later joined the printing business. Vivian was responsible for construction and then she received an offer she could not refuse: to become executive director of the Negev Institute. This was the beginning of an exciting and new career that lasted 15 years, perfectly suited to Vivian. It was so well aligned to her belief that social change was possible in areas close to her heart: feminism, peace, coexistence with Palestinians outside of Israel, and with Arabs and Bedouin within it. The work she carried out for both the Negev Institute and for AJEEC was a mission for her: the creation of a social fabric of integration and cooperation, developed out of actual onsite activities, taking small, methodical and precise steps.
Vivian was also a dedicated member of the kibbutz: a member of the secretarial committee, and active on other committees. Together with other kibbutz members she founded Tzemach, a team dedicated to the kibbutz’s social involvement. She also drove Palestinians to hospitals in Israel as part of the Road to Recovery organization. She was one of the founding members of Women Wage Peace, a member of the board of B’Tselem, and an active member of an array of other peace initiatives: Other Voice, Hamigdalor, and several others. She referred to herself as a conditional Zionist: She supported the existence of a national homeland for the Jewish people as long as it enabled the realization of national identity and a secure and respectful life for the Palestinian nation.
Aside from all their public activities, Vivian and Lewis maintained a special relationship. Louie was a homebody, whereas Vivian was a woman of the world and they both loved and respected their different ways of life. They also had different notions of parenting. Vivian accepted with love Louie’s two elder children, Josh and Dina, and she treated all the children – big and small – as adults in the making. As in all aspects of her life, in her role as mother, Vivian tried to learn from every challenging situation, and to make the most of it.
The family grew and grandchildren were born. Vivian declared herself “a very proud grandmother”. She made elaborate birthday cakes, gave the grandchildren a subscription to the Philharmonic, and went to visit the grandchildren, wherever they were. Through the years she maintained close contact with her family, and her journeys to Canada and the US were a substantial part of the family’s life.
Throughout her life, Vivian managed to forge brave social bonds. On the kibbutz, within the movement, at AJEEC, in Rahat and Gaza, in all these places she found soulmates, and she sowed cooperation and hope everywhere. Even in the safe room, that Shabbat, she kept in touch with all her friends, and she had many. It appears she knew what was happening around her, because she wrote to her children: “We may be witnessing a massacre. Without being funny, I’m telling you how much I love you all, and how blessed I am to have you.”
Vivian lived with the belief and hope that one day there would be peace because she felt it was impossible to keep living like this. She devoted her life to founding organizations that promoted the agenda she had dedicated herself to when she was 19: feminism, peace, the sisterhood of nations.
She was murdered in a ghastly outburst of hatred, cruelty and destruction.
She was 74.
May her memory be blessed.
