Carmel Gat

Carmel was the eldest daughter of Kinneret and Eshel Gat, a big sister to Alon and Or. She was the first grandchild to Ruta and Eliyahu from Be'eri, and the second to Tova and Naim Dahan from far-away Kibbutz Degania. This made her bond with her grandparents especially strong. During visits to Degania or on the lawn at her grandparents' house in Be'eri, the children loved to play wildly, and Eliyahu would occasionally have to step in to separate the bundle of energetic kids. The young family lived in the bustling neighborhood of Mishmar HaGvul, a lively area full of children. Afternoons spent playing together and shared holidays created lasting friendships and a deep sense of community.

At home, Carmel, who was relatively mature for her age, worked alongside her mother, Kinneret, to shape the cultural world of her younger siblings. She decided what books they would read, which TV series they’d watch together on the couch, and what music they’d listen to on MTV—guiding them on which bands and artists were "in" and which were "out". Alon and Or were grateful to Carmel for paving the way with their parents, setting precedents that allowed them to go to concerts, hang out at the beach with friends, and attend parties. She was not only their inspiration and role model but also their support in difficult times—always with humor and laughter.

In school, in "Petel" class, they called her "Meli", and she held a special place there. The girls of Petel didn’t usually join the boys in their mischief, but occasionally they shared in the spoils. Carmel stood out as a strong-minded child, principled with a keen sense of justice. She followed her internal compass and did what she believed was right, never swayed by the crowd. She was the first in her class to move to the big city, a refuge for classmates who found themselves there. Whenever she visited the kibbutz, she made sure to meet up with the Petel kids.

After studying the Grinberg Method, every meeting and conversation with Carmel came with her healing touch. During conversations, her magical hands would press the right spots, releasing tension both physically and emotionally. Life in Tel Aviv brought Carmel many odd jobs: delivering sandwiches to offices, assisting a disabled student by taking notes and summarizing lectures, and more. Her hallmark was always her interpersonal communication.

In a shared apartment in Tel Aviv, Carmel met Robi, and together they spent 14 years filled with love, laughter, music, friends, and their beloved dog, Zoe. Carmel was a people person, someone you could have deep conversations with and gain a new perspective. Her path naturally led her to study occupational therapy, where she chose to work with mental health patients. For the last three years, she worked in the "Eshnav for Education" program, showcasing the qualities that made her so beloved by her friends: she could see the best in everyone, make them feel special, and amplify the positive. She loved people without letting them off the hook, and her care, commitment, and ability to bring reality into the room were palpable. She was a magnet for good energy, and everywhere she went, she created circles of friendship: in the kibbutz, during her years working as an au pair for an Israeli family in Switzerland, at university, and even in Degania, when visiting her grandparents.

When she and Robi parted ways about a year and a half ago, Carmel set out on a new path. She returned to the kibbutz, planned a trip to India, and intended to come back for the final year of her master’s degree. During that time, she also supported Uri, her first serious boyfriend from the end of high school, as he faced the challenges of his illness. Quietly and creatively, she accompanied him, his wife, and their children until the very end.

Throughout her life, Carmel maintained a deep curiosity for people, places, and ideas. She traveled extensively in Israel and around the world, sometimes alone, sometimes with friends and family. Her special bond with her parents was also reflected in the trips she took with them, together and individually. In recent years, she visited India more frequently, returning to the same village she had stumbled upon during the pandemic. She was always learning something new—Feldenkrais, yoga, and various therapeutic methods. In the past few years, she took courses in Arabic, history, and Israeli geography, often alongside her mother, Kinneret, who was proud when Carmel's grades were higher than hers. Carmel read voraciously and loved listening to podcasts and music in all kinds of styles, so she was always seen with headphones. And she loved to dance, drink wine, and enjoy a beer by the sea.

About four years ago, Gefen was born to Alon and Yarden, becoming the new focal point of the family’s connection. The frequency of family gatherings increased accordingly, and Carmel was a joyful aunt, constantly coming up with a thousand ways to entertain and play with Gefen, testing her flexibility, reading her stories.

It was the same on that Saturday morning. The kids were either about to leave or had just returned from abroad, making it a particularly joyous gathering. Carmel and Alon were getting ready for a run—their new shared hobby. Instead, they found themselves in the bomb shelter. Carmel was reading Gefen a story when the terrorists entered the house. Kinneret was taken and murdered near the house. Alon, Gefen, and Yarden were kidnapped in one car, while Carmel was taken in another. She was supposed to be released two days after Yarden, but the deal fell through. The family threw themselves into the fight for the hostages' release, becoming leaders in protests, media outreach, and rallying public opinion in Israel and around the world. Facing the daily challenge of bringing up the issue of the hostages again and again, without giving up, they held onto the belief that Carmel would hold on until her release. The birthday celebration in the square and the Friday yoga sessions held across Israel and the world made Carmel a symbol of the struggle.

After 50 days of uncertainty about Carmel’s fate, Alma and Noam Or, who were kidnapped with her, returned from captivity. Inspired by Carmel, they kept a daily journal, practiced meditation, and did yoga as a way to maintain their mental and physical health. They shared how Carmel had been their guardian angel, as if her entire life had prepared her for the incredible ability to survive, support, heal, and be a pillar of strength in the darkness of Hamas captivity. They also revealed that Carmel had seen her mother murdered because the car she was in drove right by the scene. For 328 days in captivity, Carmel didn’t know what had happened to the rest of her family.

Carmel was a unique blend of softness, warmth, compassion, and love, combined with intellectual curiosity and endless inquisitiveness. She knew how to break conventions while maintaining the freedom to live life her way, always attuned to her own body and soul, as well as those of others. She had a natural, healing presence, a deep and understanding gaze, a captivating smile, a ponytail and curls, and the strength to stand tall, embodying the spirit of her mother, Kinneret—a whole world that came to an end after just 40 years.

May her memory be blessed.